Au Natural...

The Cosby Show!

I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE IT.

I helped someone move from their old house to their new one today. Working with my hands. Nothing complicated about it...here to there. Simple. There was a task, a group of people got the job done. Manual labor is a good thing...a very good thing. Clears the mind, works the body, ends with a "whew, a good day's work." Pencil pusher, I am not. Today's move was a welcome change of pace of life here...

I went home and did some work on my computer. Made a DVD for someone, emailed some peeps, cleaned me apartment up. Chatted with my sister for a while. She's dying to see me, and I her. But she retorted that because of the heat, cockroaches, and smells over here (of which I described to her in vivid language), she won't come. So she thinks...

Prayed for a while and learned that the name of God, which is Jesus, is only effective when we speak it out with the faith of the One whom the name represents. Speaking the name of Jesus over a situation does nothing if we think of it as a "magic" formula. Rather, we must know that when we invoke the name of the LORD, His presence is there immediately. But only if we act in faith and obedience.

Played an old Debussy song on my keyboard. My favorite one. Was lost for a moment there...forgot I was here. My fingers remembered the keys. Must practice more...

Finally watched an episode of the Cosby Show...my family's favorite family. I've forgotten what used to make me laugh...and still does. Watching the show, I heard the chuckle of my uncle, the smile of my cousins and aunt, the frowns and warmth of my mom and dad and sis, the many idiosyncrasies of black culture that I long to hold on to and not forget, the way "we" are. "Have I lost my identity, my culture, my personality all these years I've been away from home?" I questioned after the episode ended. Indeed, it's been a long time....a long time indeed to hear and see those who I can identify with. *sigh*....alas, they are behind a glass wall doomed to imagination once I click the "STOP" button. haha...

Today...I felt like myself again. It's been a long time.


And when he had called the people unto him with his disciples also, he said unto them, Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it.
(Mar 8:34-35)

...I'm still trying to figure the full meaning of these verses. Is losing one's identity in this world full of different cultures, mindsets, lifestyles, traditions, etc. included? hmmm...inquiring minds want to know.


The other day, this woman met me on my elevator while we were both going to work. She was frantic! "Too busy, ah...so much to do. Singapore life very busy, ah. Everyone multitasking must do...too busy." (a short moment of silence ensues as our elevator goes from floor 6 to 1. She is carrying many bags, dressed very business like, but sweating and had eyes darting all over. We reach the bottom.) "The economy is very big now, so what to do except multitask? Very busy...to much to do." (the elevator opens and she rushes out) "bye bye!" I tried at every sentence to say, "Well, I suppose we all need to find that inner peace when going through our day." I never got a chance to finish my sentence. I tried about 7 times...7. Every single time she interrupted with how busy, stressful, and tired life is in Singapore now.

It's not the first time someone has expressed these things in my presence. I refuse to allow my life to become so stressful, busy, and whatever like that. I'm beginning to understand why people in Singapore say, "Relax, relax" so much. I've never heard that word used like this in my life! There was a little boy about to come on an elevator today and the doors began to close. He was about to get hit by it, so I let out a yelp and quickly blocked the door saying, "whoa, whoa! Come on little guy!" I couldn't believe it: his parents and some other people in the elevator told me to relax. I was like, "Relax?? I'm the one safe in the elevator, your kid was about to get crushed and you tell ME to relax? Ok, next time i'll let the doors slam on him and we'll see who's relaxed." ( I literally spoke those words as I was so taken aback at their reaction to me!) Somehow, I get the feeling that the usage of that word has different connotations over here than other places. Americans don't use it in this way, I never heard the word used in Japan like this. Well, I suppose Osim is doing their best. (btw, Osim is a company that makes Starship Enterprise looking massage chairs. They are awesome...a fellow bro and I sat in one for about 15mins a couple of weeks ago. $8000 sing dollars though. ahhh..)

I put my headphones on and walked towards my bus stop in the opposite direction. Inside my heart I wept for her. We weren't made for this kind of life...stress, fast-paced, busy, busy, busy, go, go, go...

Don't worry about anything, but in all your prayers ask God for what you need, always asking him with a thankful heart. And God's peace, which is far beyond human understanding, will keep your hearts and minds safe in union with Christ Jesus.
(Phi 4:6-7)

No rhyme or reason to this post.
Just a time and season I suppose.
(dude, that was supposed to rhyme...)